Monday, May 3, 2010

It's 4am.I have a terrible cold. I have a pukey/fevery 2 year old (who ironically is a big ball of energy- at 4am). I have a 2 month old who acts eerily like the "prince" and the pea. I have a sick mom who starts radiation and chemo in 2 days. We've decided to put our house on the market. Again. I go back to work in 3 days from my maternity leave. Think my terrible cold might be stress induced? Lord, please give me strength. When I heard a scratchy little voice at 2:15 say "mommy" I knew something was wrong. My sweet lil 2 year old was covered in puke and burning up. At the exact same time my sweet lil 2 month was wailing from his crib. I'm surprised he stayed in his own bed until 2:15. He has a sort of needy/diva quality about him. (I thought the 2nd child was supposed to go with the flow and be really laid back?!) He just wants to be snuggled up to me... Not to mention the fact that I have to help him hold in his pacifier, which he is reliant on to fall asleep/stay asleep. How is he ever gonna sleep in his own bed all night if I have to hold in his pass when he wakes up? Don't get me wrong, I enjoy snuggling with him, but I enjoy a full night's (good) sleep, too. And as I said earlier- I go back to work in 3 very short days. I would desperately love for him to be in his own bed all night before I go back... How can I let him cry it out when I have a 2 year old and a husband who need sleep, too? How can I get him to hold his own pass? (Yes, I've tried multiple kinds). How can I teach him to self soothe if, again- he needs me to hold his pass? (Yes, I've tried to make him go without it- its not a pretty picture). I wish his 2 month check up wasn't 2 wks late- I have a million questions for his dr. I know you aren't supposed to compare your children, but Add slept through the night at 5 weeks and was in her crib at 8 weeks. So, honestly, this is new, slightly frustrating territory for me. I'm a little bit overwhelmed. Ok, I'm a lot overwhelmed. But every day is a new one, right? But a new day with no sleep, a sick toddler and a needy infant isn't easy. I guess even after 2 months I am still learning to navigate this "mother of 2 ship". And I imagine I will continue to learn well after my kids are grown. We can't improve if we don't learn, though, right?

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