Sunday, April 21, 2013

Hello, there, stranger.

Wowsers. Where does the time go? I’m pretty much a completely different person than I was when my fingers typed out my last bog entry. I cannot even begin to go into the changes and challenges my family has faced over the past year and a half. Some crucial relationships have ended. Some (even more crucial) relationships have been reborn. I am not going to spend any time blabbering about the ended ones for obvious reasons. They ended because they became toxic and, even though I mourned the loss for a long time, I am considerably happier without them. The most important relationship I could possibly have was regenerated in September. Robbie and I had casually talked about finding a church for over a year. Finally- partially due to the family “drama” we decided it was time that we got some much-needed guidance. It has changed my life.  I’m not a perfect person by any stretch of the imagination. But knowing that I’m loved and forgiven is the most amazing feeling.
I began following an “app” to read The Bible in 90 days a few months ago.  I have never read the entire Bible and I think I am about 2/3rds of the way through the program and it, too, has been life changing. I can literally feel myself growing and becoming better. I itch to be a better person
And to do big things.
I feel like I’m being led to run and write. (Not at the same time) ;) I’ve always struggled to stick with exercise programs and healthy living (I don’t use the word diet). In fact I have a nickname around my house- it’s “90%” because I get so close to finishing things and then just stop. Whether it’s washing , drying, folding, and putting away 9 loads of laundry and leaving the 10th load folded in the basket for a week. Or cleaning the entire kitchen and leaving one dirty coffee cup beside the sink. We joke about it, but the truth of the matter is. I’m better than 90% and I deserve more than 90% of any given task.  In light of the horrific tragedy in Boston I have felt in my heart that I want to run a half marathon. Maybe a full marathon will come in the future. But for now my sights are set on the Air Force half marathon. It’s in September. I’m almost giddy about putting my body through such hell. Because I know I can do this. I haven’t registered yet. I may do it today. I’ve never ran in my life. I’ve said my booty is too big (and Avery would attest to that ;)) But that’s a cheap excuse. So- the main point of this blog from here on out is to track my emotions and feelings as  I TRAIN FOR A HALF MARATHON!!!
I mentioned that I also feel as though I’m being called to write. I’ve had two “signs” in the past week that I should pursue writing. Although, one of them is simply positive feedback from a Facebook post… and one of them is a printed version of a letter I sent to People magazine… Yes! A letter I sent was printed on the “mailbag” page of People magazine. I feel these are both indications that I need to write. I wrote a little story about a teddy bear named Bubbles when I was a little girl and my dad told me I should stick to writing. I’ve been told multiple times in my adult life that I should write. So. Where do I go from here? I guess time will tell. But as I finish reading The Bible in 90 days. As I begin training for long distance running. I’m certain God is going to reveal what it is I’m destined to write. Maybe it’s simply this blog tracking my setbacks and accomplishments? We’ll see…..